


Don't Be Stupid Derek

by RougueShadowWolf



Series: 15 Minutes [109]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Hurt Stiles, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Lonely Stiles Stilinski, M/M, Sad Derek Hale, Sad Stiles Stilinski, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-05-18 00:49:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5891734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RougueShadowWolf/pseuds/RougueShadowWolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek knew the second he saw the look on Stiles’ unusually pale face that he’s spoken the words he would never under normal circumstance say, because although the kid drove him crazy with worry and the constant fear that one day one slash of claws later, a sharp bite, a knife to the gut a bullet through the heart later Stiles would be gone. Stiles alive and gone was something Derek could handle but dead and gone was something he wasn’t strong enough for he’d lost far too much already.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So here we are another year and a new start with 15minutes fic’s. To those still unfamiliar with this series of little stories written by little old me, each fic is written under a painful time limit of 15min, I am given a few details on what to write and then it’s off so any errors in spelling or whatnot will be painfully frequent and if that’s a major issue for you then move along. And to those familiar with this series and my stories in general and who have an issue with my fic’s and so on I beg of you be wise if only once in your life and just skip these stories because why waste your time really? And to those who are fans of these panicked little scribbles Hi There and I do hope you’ll enjoy another round of my madness.  
> But let’s begin shall we? SO this fic is requested/demanded by let us call her Vulgar-Voyeur (she’s rolling her pretty little eyes like a proper Hale) who is a sterek worshiper asked for a little fic with her favorite pairing, yes my merry little darlings this is going to be yet another attempt at Sterek by me, she wants this however start out with Derek being a dick and loses Stiles and he gets a visit by Laura’s ghost or his mother’s ghost or Claudia’s ghost. Vulgar-Voyeur also wanted there to be a mention of rape or attempted rape, as well as suicide. Yes, she wanted me to kill of Stiles which she didn’t say outright and so I messed this fic up but she still found it interesting.

Stiles is driving him crazy which isn’t really a new thing especially not when Derek was in pain and struggling to heal. Of course Derek knew in the back of his mind that Stiles wasn’t driving him up the wall intentionally but as he sat there bleeding all over the new but old couch Stiles had somehow managed to drag up into the loft without Derek noticing it until it was too late to stop it. Struggling to breathe through the pain that came from the damage  the rogue Alpha had caused Derek was causing Derek to lose the ability to think straight which could also be due to the loss of blood most of which now stained the interior of Stiles Jeep that was working against his ability to not give too much power to Stiles ability to annoy him.

  
Being weak and needing help was annoying enough without Stiles being there trying to play nurse once again, and why was it always Stiles who played the part of the pack nurse? 

The plaid shirt Stiles had been wearing was ruined with Derek’s blood and for someone who claimed to have issues with blood Stiles sure seemed alright when dealing with Derek’s bleeding body. Derek can’t stop glaring at the human who was wrapping up Derek’s knee, which was pointless as it would mend perfectly fine now that Stiles had with the help of Cora and Peter popped it back into Place. Stiles honestly did looked green around the gills but continued stubbornly to wrap Derek’s knee while mumbling about how stupid and suicidal Derek was which was frankly the pot calling the kettle black as Stiles had only half-an-hour ago thrown himself between Derek and an Alpha waving aorund his stupid bat.

  
Derek knows that one day Stiles would get himself killed because Stiles wasn’t Wolverine or Superman or even Batman he was just a human with no sense, and clearly an inability to shut-up.

  
Sitting there with the Stiles at his feet calling _him_ stupid and irresponsible all Derek wants is for Stiles to shut-the-fuck-up, to stop talking because he’s so annoying even his voice is graining on Derek's nerves like everything else about Stiles, Derek just wishes Stiles would leave after all there was no reason for Stiles to be there, just because he tag along Scott didn't grant him the right to around to annoy Derek to death. Derek couldn’t stand the little hyperactive little…

  
Everything stops,  but not before there’s an angry growl from Scott and a slightly less hostile one from Isaac, the room goes quiet and nothing moves and the atmosphere is a tense one while the air in the loft grows colder, and Derek feels the hairs at the back of his neck stand up. Everything quiet for a second or two, not a heartbeat to be heard except for his own, and then he hears it that painfully familiar voice he’d thought he would never hear again say,`You damn idiot.´

  
Derek stops breathing and slowly her turns his head just enough that he can see the person that broke and otherwise perfect but oppressive silence, his heart does a funny thing inside his chest when he catches sight of Laura who was standing there by the window overlooking the miserable street bellow it and Stiles’ old Jeep that seemed one gearshift away from breaking down permanently.

  
He’s up from where Stiles and Peter had deposited him only ten or so minutes ago knocking his already injured knee into the pale by stone hard face of Stiles Stilinski, the pain of the impact and the weight he puts on his injured knee causes him to stumble and fall back down onto the soft couch with a loud groan.

  
`Oh Der-bear you sad idiot.´ Laura sighs and then she’s right there helping him to sit upright and face Stiles and for once Derek can’t wait to look away from the kid with the pales skin Derek had ever seen and it wasn’t just because he was desperate to see his sister, his dead sister no less, it was the fact that the expression stuck on Stiles face made him feel ill at ease something that made Derek wish Stiles’ expression would change into something he could handle like that annoying expression of “Are you kidding me Derek” or “Hey I’ve got an idea” or even that “Oh my God this should not be turning me on but it is” look that was always accompanied by the stench of arousal.

  
`Laura?´ Derek can barely bring himself to say her name now when face with her, she looks so alive and yet there something about her that tells him she’s not, but he’d rather have her here like this than not at all. She nods once before hugging him tightly but still it doesn’t cause him the pain he’d been expecting, his broken ribs and cut-up back and chest didn’t protests against the touch the slightest.

  
`I’ve missed you so much.´ Derek chocks out as tears he’s been trying to keep locked away start to fall, `I’ve missed you so much.´

  
`I’ve missed you too.´ Laura admits voice soft and full of sadness that makes it hard for Derek not to just let it all go and cry against her shoulder as he had done once the fact that they had lost everything had hit him, and much like way back then she holds him tightly hushes him softly.

  
`I – I shouldn’t have let you go.´ Derek sobs out, `I should’ve gone with you.´

  
`No.´ Laura responds firmly and pulling away just enough so they could look into each other’s eyes, while Derek had his mother’s eyes Laura and Cora had their fathers but there had always been a strength in Laura’s eyes that had none the less mirrored their mother’s so much so that Derek had respected her as much as he’d done their mother and Alpha.

  
`No Derek, you can’t think like that – you shouldn’t think like that.´ Laura tells him softly but her eyes were glowing Alpha red demanding he believe her.

  
`But if I had…´ Derek insists tears of guilt and sorrow still streaming down his face much like it had done all those years ago when he’d been nothing more than a stupid kid who thought lust equaled love.

  
`No. No. You listen to me Derek Sebastian Hale,´ she’s got him pinned with her eyes and a gentle hand against his cheek even without her voice going all “listen to me I’m your big sister and I know everything” on him, `If you’d been with me then he would’ve killed us both – you’d be as dead as me.´ Derek shakes his head and begins to argue, begins to insist if he’d been there he could’ve protected her or helped her at least to survive the night or to kill Peter.

  
`No Derek.´ Laura insists, `No he would’ve killed you and me, he would’ve made me watch as he killed you and that would’ve doomed me.´ and then as she kissed his temple Laura sighed softly, `Nothing you or I could’ve done that night would’ve changed what happened to me, you staying alive saved that naïve uneven-jawed kid from killing his best friend or Peter doing it for him.´

  
Derek’s heart skips a beat for some reason as he thinks about Stiles getting ripped to pieces by Scott or Peter.

  
`That’s right Derek, ´ Laura tells him softly petting his cheek gently, ` You had to survive to stop a great deal of damage from transpiring, if Stiles was killed by Scott or even Peter during those early days young McCall over there would’ve lost it completely and nothing good comes from a feral werewolf now does it?´

  
`Now of course I would’ve loved it if I hadn’t died, ´ Laura confesses, `But if I’d survived you wouldn’t be here and neither would I, and not only would Peter be dead but Stiles too.´

  
The protest Derek had been ready to voice before Stiles was brought into the conversation dies down as he has to question why the annoying and stupid kid would be dead. Shouldn’t Stiles’ life be better and safer without the whole werewolf mess in his life?

  
`Wanting to protect the ones you love isn’t stupidity Derek, it’s instinctual.´ Laura says softly while her focus moves to Stiles, `Stiles is just the sort of kid who will do anything for those he’s allowed to slip into his heart. It’s not stupidity Derek it’s something one should value far more than his ability to do research or think outside the box.´ Laura looks at Stiles like he’s something so very rare that you would be beyond blessed if you caught sight of it once in your life time, `How I wish I would’ve met him, I bet we would’ve made the best of friends.´

  
`Why do you insist on hurting him Derek? ´ the question catches Derek of guard sits there like an idiot.

  
`No response? Well that’s not unlike you little brother.´ Laura says shaking her head as she turns around to face him and she no longer looks angry or sad just disappointed and that’s perhaps the worst expression she could pull on Derek at the moment.

  
`If you think you are protecting him by breaking his heart and spirit then let me tell you Derek that you are wrong, horribly wrong.´

  
`Did you know that if you hadn’t been dragged back to Beacon Hills this kid wouldn’t be here today, breathing and laughing, even without Peter going crazy?´

  
`What? ´ Derek chocks and glances over at Stiles, `what, why? ´

  
`Stiles smiles a lot, talks a lot, laughs a lot.´ Laura says with an air of sadness, `But this kid doesn’t have all that much in his life once you strip it down. Take away you and the pack, remove Scott and what has the brave boy got left? ´

  
Derek knows Stiles would still have his dad and surely someone else he just doesn’t know about.

  
`Just hid dad, ´ Laura agrees, `a dad who works all hours of the day who wouldn’t notice his son missing unless it happen right before his very eyes.´ Laura looks back down rather pityingly at Stiles which is something Derek can’t do, `Even if Scott hadn’t been turned into a werewolf he would’ve still gotten attached to Allison, and without the whole werewolf thing Stiles would’ve been completely forgotten, abandoned really.´

  
`No. No, you’re wrong,´ Derek insists, ` Stiles he’s got friends, like – like,´ but Laura laughs bitterly out, ` Who? The goalie? Oh come on Derek that kid might have a little crush on Stiles but he’s not going to sink to Stiles level not with a friend like Jackson.´ Laura looks positively heartbroken as she continues, `Want to see where he’d be at this moment if Peter hadn’t gone off on a killing spree, if you and I hadn’t come back or had done so together? ´

  
Derek’s about to say no but she smirks at him before saying, `Well you can say no but I’m still going to show you.´ and with that she snaps her fingers and suddenly everything is twirling and swirling, moving and morphing until they’re standing outside surrounded by gravestones.

  
`Look.´ Laura says pointing at a small gravestone with a first name that seems like a typo and the last name that’s painfully familiar and below them are the words, “Just call me Stiles” there’s a date of birth and a date of death which suggest Stiles had died only a couple of months after starting high school or rather a couple of days after Christmas, seeing the date of Stiles death was a shock and Derek’s mind works on all the various causes behind it such as perhaps Stiles had crashed the Jeep or fallen down the stairs.  
`What? What happened? ´ Derek asks, he feels like he’s being chocked to death.

  
`In one version the one where Peter was left to run freely, without you around to help Scott kills him, Stiles went searching for him alone and well Scott ripped him to pieces.´ Laura says sadly brushing away a couple of dead leaves off of the simple piece of grey stone, `In another it’s Peter after kill us Peter’s thirst for blood doesn’t just stop with seeking revenge, Stiles went out looking for Scott and found Peter instead, even if Peter hadn’t slashes Stiles throat at the end the damage he did would’ve killed Stiles – this version will kill the Sheriff as he drinks himself to death after hearing what his son had gone through before he was finally killed.´ Derek can’t even imagine what Peter could’ve done but he fears it none the less, he’s seen the way Peter looks at Stiles and the way he sneaks little inappropriate touches in here and there.

  
`Then there’s the one that would happen even if you and I didn’t return, ´ Laura sighs running her hand over the cold slab of stone, `Peter comes across Stiles one night after Stiles’ car breaks down, in his madness Peter drags Stiles into the woods and well spends a couple of hours dealing with pent-up frustration, he doesn’t kill Stiles but what he did to him and the story Stiles tells about a monster does. No one believes him not his dad, not Scott, and in the end he’s left alone and isolated and when Peter attacks him a second time around in his own bedroom Stiles takes his father’s gun and well blows his brains out.´ Derek feels close to being sick, but Laura takes no pity on him and continues.

  
`And then there’s the one where we beat Peter, the one where everything should go right.´ Laura glances over at the man moving slowly towards them, `Scott and Allison still become a thing, Scott doesn’t need Stiles because Scott’s not a werewolf and so it’s easier to ignore Stiles, forget about him and plans for this or that. Stiles is left alone to deal with all the shit that comes with having no friends at all and being a smart kid, alone he’s a target for bullies and he’s grades start to drop and when they do his dad who’s never around tells him he’s a disappointment –perhaps not right out but the message is clear.´

  
The man with uneasy steps and dressed in ill-fitted clothes, carrying a paper bag with a bottle of what smells like the cheapest whiskey on the market continues to move towards them slurring the words to the song Hurt the very son that had played on the radio when Stiles had tried to rush Derek back to the loft earlier that evening, sadly the drunk doesn’t sound half as nice as Johnny Cash did.

  
`He spent Christmas alone, no dad, no Scott to keep him company, nothing but Stiles and his thoughts of being a failure at everything and a bottle or two of Jack,´ the miserable looking man was now a few feet away from Derek and it’s then that Derek recognizes the miserable looking creature as the Sheriff, `alone and miserable and severely intoxicated Stiles took one of his dad’s guns slipped it in his mouth and pulled the trigger, sadly he wasn’t sober enough to do a good job and suffered for a while before dying finally dying. ´ The Sheriff kneels down beside his son’s grave hands shaky as he sets down the bottle and pulls out a small candle from within the smelly and stained jacket.

  
`With all the neighbors gone away for Christmas except for the deaf lady next door it took for Stiles body to start to stink for the Sheriff to realize that perhaps his son wasn’t just avoiding him.´

  
`Oh God.´ Derek croaks before everything starts to spin and they are back inside the loft with the pack frozen in place around them, Derek feel close to vomiting but keeps it together because he’s fairly certain he wouldn’t make it to the small broken down bathroom in time.

  
`So you see,´ Laura starts, ` you not being here would’ve killed him one way or another, ´ Laura states like it was a fact that could not be changed no matter what evidence was found to contradict it, `He’s strong but only as strong as people _need_ him to be.´

  
`Always has.´ an unfamiliar and sorrowful voice says from somewhere behind them, startling both Derek and his sister.


	2. He called me Mama

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it seems my dearest Vulgar-Voyeur wanted me to continue with this so here we are, and she wanted there to be this thing where Claudia shows Derek what his words the ones he’s spoken without thinking would do to Stiles unless he fixed it, so she wanted a lot of angst and hurt Stiles and suicidal or whatnot thoughts, but she also wanted Peter to do his wickedness here. So blame her for what crap will follow.

 

The woman with long wave brown hair framing a face that looked oddly familiar to Derek moved slowly across the floor her otherwise white summer dress stained with blue handprints that looked like a child had ran over to her and hugged her around her legs before being picked-up and held close to her chest. She doesn’t grant him or Laura a single glance all her brown eyes seem able to see is the frozen figure of Stiles Stilinski, it is as if the rest of the world didn’t exist besides from her and Stiles for a fracture of a moment.

This unfamiliar and yet familiar woman kneels down beside Stiles her hands gently stroking the face that was now as hard as stone and fearing and expression Derek suspected he would not soon forget.

`Oh my brave little boy how you’ve grown.´ and with that she leaned in to kiss the temple of the young male that had faced Alpha’s and Kanima’s as well as hunters without bowing out in fear when he so easily could’ve done it, and it’s then that it clicks to Derek who this woman cradling Stiles face so lovingly was.

`Claudia Stilinski? ´ Derek breathes out, and Laura confirms it voice barely above a whisper, `Yes, it’s her. She’s never found peace you know, she thought she would but it’s hard to leave your baby in a world you know never sees through his brave façade.´

Derek could positively feel the love and sorrow radiate from the kneeling woman who seemed to try and memories every detail of Stiles’ face, the grief Derek feels leave from the mother who seemed to behave as if she’d been unable to see or touch her child in decades.

`How I’ve missed you, ´ Claudia Stilinski confesses sorrowfully, `I missed you long before I had to leave you to where you could not follow. I’m so sorry baby for leaving you, I never wanted too but I couldn’t stop it and you had to be safe.´ her slender arms wrapped themselves around the awkwardly kneeling body, `I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you.´ She weeps against Stiles shoulder, `I’m so very sorry kochanie.´

`But I’m going to protect you now, I’m not going to let this pass.´ and with that she was up and dragging Derek up and off of the couch by his ear.

`YOU!´ the woman hisses like an angry snake as she drags Derek towards the window overlooking the street where Stiles’ jeep still sat and waiting for someone to deal with the blood staining its inside.

Laura yells out the name Stiles never voiced even if it wasn’t directly attached to his mother as it seemed to cause him to chock but Claudia doesn’t halt not until she’s got Derek standing right in front of the windows Stiles had been demanding Derek to get cleaned.

`YOU broke his heart! You broke what was left of his heart and you shall fix it or I swear I will destroy yours.´ the woman screams before pushing him right through the window but there’s no painful or messy drop on top of the Jeep instead Derek lands on the familiar floor of Stiles’ bedroom, right beside the bed that held beneath it a baseball bat Derek hadn’t seen before.

Derek’s knee protests as does the rest of him as he struggles to sit up the room is bathed in the weak light of the lamp standing on Stiles desk, the room looked pretty much the same as it did when Derek had been there earlier that day.

`Get-up.´ the angry mother hisses before pulling him up by the scruff of his neck and he’s being pushed through walls and straight into the Stilinski bathroom where Stiles was sitting beneath the spray of the water that came from the showerhead that was probably no longer being sold in any store unless it was a thrift store. Stiles is perfectly naked and Derek tries to turn his gaze from the boy who seemed like he was struggling to breathe.

`Look! Look what you’ve done to my boy!´ Claudia Stilinski screams as Stiles crawls out of the shower and towards the small cabinet beneath the bathroom sink, Stiles is trembling from head to toe and his heartbeat is so loud and unstable in its haste that Derek worries that the human heart would exhaust itself.

`Look at what you’re forcing him to do.´ Claudia hisses as Stiles manages to open the door, in a state of panic Stiles digs through the cabinet until a small batman lunch box is pulled out, `He’s been so good for years, but you did this to him.´ Stiles opens the box and Derek sees a tiny piece of what looks like a little surgical knife, Stiles hastily cleans the blade before sitting down and starting to drag the blade across the pale skin of his thighs.

`Stiles, stop it.´ Derek shouts and tries to reach out to make the boy who keeps cutting one bleeding line after another until his breathing calms down and his heartbeat slows down, but every time Derek tries to grab at the knife his hand just goes through Stiles as if he were a ghost but he keeps trying but Stiles doesn’t stop not until he’s finally done and both of his thighs are covered in at least five bleeding cuts and there’s blood on the floor.

Stiles lets out a deep but satisfied sigh as the knife falls to the floor and for a few minutes Stiles just sits there breathing in and out slowly, head dropping to the side as his entire body suddenly loses the tightness that had made him stiff and rough in his movements.

`You broke him,´ Claudia accuses him as Derek tires to put some pressure on the cuts, he’s not sure how deep or dangerous they were to Stiles health but he knew he had to do something to make the blood stop escaping Stiles so painfully human body.

`You cut the last string that held him together.´ Claudia hisses at him, before grabbing him by the scruff of his neck and then there no longer inside the bathroom watching Stiles bleeding with an expression of bliss on his face, they’re at the high school watching Stiles moving slowly and somewhat hunched, Derek sees Stiles look up only once towards the pack his gaunt face trying to pull a smile upon his face as he catches Scott’s eyes but the young werewolf and the others just turn their backs to him and Derek could swear that he could hear Stiles’ heart break at that moment.

`You did this to my son.´ Claudia snarls at him and Derek tries to protest but Stiles’ mother will have none of it and continues to growl at him, `If the Alpha of a pack rejects a pack-mate or rejects a person what does the pack do Derek Sebastian Hale? What does the pack do?!´

There’s tightness in his throat suddenly.

`They reject the unwanted one, am I right?´ and Derek can only nod and watch as what looks like a couple of guys who spend too much time at the gym and too little studying shove Stiles against the lockers, the books in Stiles hands go flying but that’s not enough as one of the idiots rips Stiles backpack off of his shoulder and dumps everything in it to the floor before not so accidentally pouring his soda all over the papers and books scattered in a heap on the floor.

Not a single member of the pack rushes to Stiles aide not even Stiles gets shoved face first into the locker and his nose starts to bleed profusely.

`This isn’t even the worst thing he has to go through after you and the pack abandon him,´ Claudia hisses before yanking him back and into what looks like Stiles Jeep but Stiles isn’t there instead he’s inside the pharmacy and Derek can see him waiting in the line anxiously but then suddenly Derek attention is drawn away from Stiles to a dark figure that slips inside the Jeep and into the back, Derek knows this is no a human the movements were far too graceful and far too powerful to be that of a normal human being.

Fear grips at Derek’s heart when he recognizes the figure hiding in the back of Stiles Jeep as his uncle, all the things he’d learned about Peter while with Laura suddenly rushes into his mind, and he screams for Stiles to get away as the human starts to make his way over to the Jeep.

`He can’t hear you.´ Claudia whispers and she’s not even looking at Stiles at the moment, she just stares out the window body rigid where she’s seated.

Stiles slips inside the car placing the bag with several different bottles of pills on the seat next to his own, before settling in behind the wheel. Stiles looks tired and gaunt, there’s a bruise below his left eye, and maybe that’s why he doesn’t react the when Peter begins to move and knocks down a bag of what looks like a change of clothes, Derek tries to warn Stiles but it has as much of an effect as whispering in across the sea for a love to return. Peter reaches out and covers Stiles mouth with one hand and the other grips Stiles throat tightly, and Derek can only watch and smell the stench of his Uncles ill intentions.

`Hello Stiles. Long time no see sweetheart.´ Peter purrs into Stiles ear, and Peter’s voice is almost drowned out by the loud frantic beat of Stiles’ heart, `Now you are going to be a good little boy for me aren’t you?´ Stiles doesn’t nod but Peter seems to think he does and whispers softly in his ear, `Now you and me are going to take a drive, and you aren’t going to try any funny business darling or I will make those little cuts of yours feel like butterfly kisses. And I will let everyone know how broken and ruined the Sheriff’s little delinquent is. Do you want that baby? ´

Stiles naturally shakes his head.

`Peter, ´ Derek snarls, `Peter, I swear if you…´but before Derek can finish his threat of burning Peter alive everything changes around them, and suddenly Derek is standing in the middle of what looks like the abandoned mall, Claudia is nowhere to be seen and the only thing he hears is screams like none he’d heard before and yet he recognizes the source of it.

`Stiles!´ Derek yells as he struggles to run towards the direction of the horrible sound, it takes him far too long to figure out where the screams are coming from and when he does they stop and a new sense of dread floods him.

Stiles has stopped screaming but he’s still crying, making little distressed sounds, his hands are tied with his own belt to the urinal, and Stiles broken fingers are clawing at the wall as if trying to dig himself free and out of the horrific situation he’s in. Stiles is on his knees huddled as close to the wall as possible crying quietly against the wall, naked body bloodied and bruised while Peter takes a leak right next to him. And Claudia is kneeling behind her son and is hugging him repeating the words, `I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.´

Derek wants to kill his uncle, rip him to pieces and burn his still living body to ashes.

`Oh that’s better.´ Peter smiles down at Stiles who tries to move further away from Peter as he moves closer, `Wouldn’t want to piss in my pretty little slut now would I?´

`It’s okay kochanie , it’s okay.´ Claudia cries against her son’s messy hair, but there’s also another Claudia standing nearby glaring at Derek hissing out, `You did this to him just as much as this piece of scum is.´

`Ready for round two bitch? ´ Peter asks as he grabs Stiles by the ankles and pulls, ignoring completely the way Stiles tries to fight him or his mother’s advice not too, Stiles lands a kick right between Peter’s legs and that’s not something Peter would just let go and so Derek isn’t surprised when Peter slams Stiles head against the wall so hard that Stiles eyes roll inside his head and he goes almost perfectly limp aside from a couple of twitches.

`That’s it baby, be a good boy for daddy.´ Peter purrs as he moves Stiles into the position he wants him in, and Derek has to turn away and throw up as Peter pushed back inside the abused and bloodied hole, `Oh still so virgin tight baby.´

`its okay baby, you can go. You can go.´ the weeping Claudia whispers softly while Derek can hear the familiar heartbeat of the pale youth slowing down, skipping beats until one last drawn out beat is followed by a light exhale and silence, Stiles eyes stare at him but there’s nothing there just the emptiness of a life stolen away far too son.

Peter doesn’t notice Stiles departure, he continues to spew filth at the body that doesn’t contain what had made Stiles who he was, the spark of life that had been so enticing to not only Derek but Peter too gone, and Derek knows that he is going to kill his uncle once he’s able to do so because he was never going to risk having Peter anywhere near Stiles.

`I will kill.´ Derek spits at his uncle and as he does the surroundings change and suddenly he’s back inside the loft and Laura his screaming bloody murder at Claudia Stilinski who didn’t look the slightest bit intimidated by Laura’s anger, the mother just walks over to her son kissing the top of Stiles’ head before kneeling next to him and hugging him tightly.

Derek struggles to find his balance by the window through which he’d felt himself fly through but there it is as solid as all the frozen figures in the room in which he is standing with two spirits that felt so real, but Derek doesn’t care about Laura’s wrath of Claudia Stilinski’s tears of soft whispers he surges towards his uncle who stands at the back of the couch and it hadn’t been Derek he’d been looking at but Stiles and the glee on the older-werewolf’s face makes his blood run cold, and Derek knows to protect Stiles he has to kill his uncle.

`You are dead Peter. You are dead, do you hear me, dead.´ Derek snarls in Peter’s ear but Laura hears him none the less and she turns around to face him, she looks almost afraid of him and perhaps she should be because Derek will kill anyone who would dare to do any of the things he’d seen done to Stiles.

`Derek? Derek, what happened?´ his sister asks, and Derek tells her not in vivid detail what he’d seen his uncle do because although he doesn’t care what Laura’s opinion will be he still wishes she’d understand why he would send their uncle to hell. Laura looks shocked but she doesn’t tell him not to do it, all she does is nod and Derek would forever take it as her blessing.

`Even if you kill him, ´ Stiles mother sighs sorrowfully, `my son will die, unless, ´ and that’s when she turns to face him and her eyes are full of sorrow, `you change.´ 


	3. Age with Me and We Shall See

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh lords and ladies of my demented court, Voluptuous-Vixen now anted a throw her own stick into this fic with the request for Talia Hale to slip in with her own thing to show Derek, and that’s all besides from asking for some Mpreg what she gave me and I have no idea what happened!!!

Derek isn’t sure what he’s about to say or rather he has no idea what he should say to the displeased mother of the boy Derek did care for even if he was too much of a coward to admit it. He wants to say something and knows he should but before he’s able to think of anything to a familiar voice that seemed capable of demanding respect just by saying ones name calls out the name of Claudia Stilinski who immediately turns her glare towards the spiral-staircase as do Derek and Laura both knowing who it is they will see.

`Mom.´ both Derek and Laura say although Derek’s far more chocked-up than Laura’s, and unlike Laura who hurries over to greet and scent their mother Derek just stands there taking in how healthy and strong his mother seems, she’s dressed in her favorite white suite the one she only wore when she worried things might not go in her favor.

Derek drinks-up the appearance of his mother the way she is now since he’d nearly forgotten that his mother hadn’t always been a burned out husk of a woman.

`Derek,´ it’s all she needs to say to have him throwing himself at her and hugging her tightly like a lost child finally reunited with its mother, crying far more desperately than what he’d done with Laura just a passing of a moment ago. He cries his apologize between sobs and unlike Laura his mother doesn’t hush him all she does his hold him and rub his back while encouraging him to let it all out and he does while clinging on to her with such desperation he’d never felt before.

When Derek had finished crying they are alone in the loft, well apart from his pack that were still stuck the way they had been ever since Laura had arrived, but Derek is unaware of the sudden departure of his sister and the mother of the boy Derek dared not to love.

`All cried out, my little wolf?´ his mother asks him and he nods and then shakes his head and then nods again, which makes her smile at him sorrowfully before kissing away a stray tear.

`It’s alright to cry you know.´ she tells him as she takes him over to the couch, helping him to sit back down, always touching which alone was comforting to him, the settled close together, Derek leaning against his who was no longer of the intimidating size she’d once been but then again Derek had grown in more ways than one.

`I’m sorry.´ Derek starts but she hushes him.

`She took advantage of you, ´ his mother tells him firmly but gently none the less, `and that is not your fault Derek. It was never your fault baby, none of us blame you.´ and her smile is honest and touch is gentle as she continues to dry his tears.

`She’s to blame, not you by darling boy.´ Derek wishes he could believe it to be true, he wishes it was true but he’d let the snake of a woman into his heart, he spoke of secrets he should never have shared with anyone.

`Oh Derek, I had my suspicions something was going on but,´ his mother confesses and it startles Derek out of his self-loathing, `but you seemed so happy, you were smiling for the first time since Paige died, and so I ignored my worries because I just wanted to see my beautiful child happy again. ´ Derek can’t believe what he’s hearing.

`A mother’s first duty is to protect her children, and Alpha’s duty is to protect their pack, and I failed at both.´

`No. Mom. No.´ Derek quickly says which makes his mother smile sorrowfully before pulling him closer and kissing his hand gently.

`If you will blame yourself then I shall blame myself.´ she informs him, and the settle next to each other and are silent for a few minutes soaking up each other’s scents and comfort before Talia Hale goes back to speaking, her voice is gentle and soft, ` None of us could’ve known what was ahead Derek, none of us ever know unless by some divine intervention, so don’t blame yourself telling her things Derek. I remember when I met your father I told him everything too, your father thought I was crazy and avoided me for a few days until I managed to corner him and show him it was all true.´

Then with a sigh she softly whispered, ` love makes fools of us all Derek.´

`Just look at that young boy,´ and her eyes moved over to where Stiles was still kneeling, `He thinks keeping his father out of all of this protects him better than knowing the truth, he thinks never telling anyone how alone he feels or how he hurts protects everyone around him.´

Derek looks at Stiles but he can only stomach it for a second or two before the expression on his pale face becomes too much and what he’d seen a moment ago with Claudia makes him look away, it’s then that his mother places a comforting hand to the nape of his neck.

`He’s a protector at heart, loyal to a fault, brave even when faced with death, and you know he is pack and more than that.´ her words settle uncomfortable in his heart and he wants to argue but the intense gaze in her eyes holds him silent, `All a mother wants is for her child is to be happy Derek, and you will never be happy if you continue to push him away and one day you will be even more miserable once he is so far from your reach that you can’t seek even the smallest bit of his comfort.´

`I’m not,´ Derek protests but the lie is weak at best and he doesn’t even bother to try and carry it through, instead he lowers his head and sighs, `What – what if this life will kill him?´

`Let’s see, shall we?´ his mother asks but before Derek can protest he feels something change in him and then he’s opening his eyes and everything feels different, he feels less tense and his heart feels light in his chest and as he turns to lay on his side without think about doing so he feels like he’s about to stop breathing when he sees a familiar figure sleeping there beside him, and suddenly he recalls something his father had once told him when his mother was expecting Cora.

`There’s nothing quite as amazing as waking up to finding your mate in bed with you in the early hours of the morning, so close and sleeping peacefully while your little cub is growing inside them,´ the words ring inside his head but then there is another voice that is more like a thought, Derek’s own thought that replies, `There’s nothing more wonderful than seeing our mate’s once flat stomach now like this, one great big dome of stretched skin that we’re allowed to touch and kiss as much as Stiles will allow us which isn’t all that much since Stiles is rather ticklish.´ And if Derek was positively honest there was something absolutely lovely about this slightly older Stiles sleeping beside him his once flat stomach stretched out like that of a pregnant woman, but how could it be.

`He’s your mate Derek, ´ he hears his mother say and Derek turns his head to see her sitting beside Stiles reaching her hand out to touch the round belly, `and he would do anything for you, even the unimaginable.´ a content smile rises on her lips as something visibly moves beneath the pale skin, `but for him to manage this I must say I am impressed.´

`He’s pregnant?´ Derek whispers in awe just as he begins to hear three little heartbeats none of which is Stiles and he stares up at his mother who can’t help but chuckle a little at his expression.

`Three little ones all for you Derek, never doubt his love son.´ but although his heart is willing-up with a sense of love he’d never imagined he could feel he shakes his head and whispers, `I can’t, I can’t lose him.´

`Oh Derek, are you so afraid of losing him, of losing what he could give you that you’d rather push him away before you could truly enjoy the happiness he could bring?´ Derek really doesn’t need to answer but he still says yes, and then he confesses how he can’t deal with loving something once more only to lose it.

`My little one, we all love and lose sometimes.´ his mother tells him and it only angers him and Derek sits up and hisses angrily over the pregnant male, `Haven’t I lost enough already?´

`You have, but that doesn’t doom you to a life of misery darling boy.´ his mother tells him before tilting her head just as the sound of little feet running down the hall towards where they were could be heard as well as a soft little voice softly calling out excitedly, `Dadas.´

`I think you need to see a little bit more.´ Talia says and Derek protests as the bedroom door opens and a little hand appears but then it’s gone and Derek is standing in the same room as before but there a lot of people around, all standing surrounding the bed on which he’d been on with a pregnant Stiles but a second ago if even that. He’s unable to recognize any of the face surrounding him, but he recognizes the expression they are wearing and it causes a lump to appear in his throat, and then as he turns to face the bed he sees someone who looks eerily familiar, and he has to ask his mother who the skeletally thin old-man with white hair and thick glasses sitting on the edge of the bed was while another figure appeared in the bed equally old and fragile and close to death.

His mother whispers softly, `Your mate sweetheart. That’s Stiles.´ her eyes are focused on the skeletally thin man who moves slowly, life-worn hands gently touching the slightly bulkier figure that was on the bed eyes closed and lips parted a little revealing a set of familiar and humiliating bunny-teeth.

`Is – is that me?´ he asks his mother while watching this well-aged version of Stiles Stilinski gently pet the dark-grey hair of the man that was slowly fading away from life, Stiles is may keep up a brave face but the way he keeps almost compulsively swallowing reveals how difficult the moment is to this palest version of Stiles Stilinski.

`Yes, son.´ his mother tells him softly before taking his hand and holding it tightly.

Stiles leans down thinned lips kissing the older version of Derek gently on his forehead and then right between the now almost completely white and grey eyebrows, each kiss full of love and devotion Derek had never thought he would ever deserve, but there Stiles was and with each kiss he whispered softly, `My love, my wolf, my Alpha, my mate, my life I love you.´ and each time Stiles’ voice seemed to break a little bit more.

Derek feels something inside his chest that makes him weep with joy.

`Can you feel it? Feel his love? The love you’ve shared?´ his mother asks and Derek nods as he thinks he does, and he’s almost jealous of this version of himself for ever feeling so much love.

Stiles pauses for a minute to gaze over the aged face of his mate and husband, his trembling hands gentle taking in the details of the face he’d shared years looking at over morning cups of coffee.

`It’s time my love,´ Stiles says while the first tears fall and although he fights to keep his voice from not revealing the heartache he feels all in the room knows it pains him to speak the following words, `I’m ready to let you go now my wolf, ´ and Stiles pets the aged-Derek’s cheek gently, `I know you’ve been hanging on for me, and I’ve been cruel to keep you this long when all you want to do is run and be free.´

Derek can feel the struggle Stiles is going through.

`You can’t live forever Derek, ´ Derek hears his mother whisper, `but see, you can live a long and happy life. ´

Derek turns to look at the people surrounding the older version of himself and Stiles and before he can ask his mother says, `Five children all strong and healthy, sixteen grandkids later that have their own little ones, I dare you say it’s not worth opening your heart to Stiles, ´ his mother says while smiling lovingly down at a toddler who is looking straight up at her.

Derek turns his attention back to this much older and fragile version of Stiles who whispers softly in the older-version of Derek’s ear, `Go my love, reunite with those we’ve lost.´ and then Stiles leans down to kiss the dying version of Derek, and as their lips part Derek hears Stiles say, ` I love you, always have even when you were a nothing more than a Sourwolf.´ and then as Stiles sniffles out the words, `Just go, get things ready for me.´ the last beat of the old heart is heard and a slow heavy exhale leaves the older-version of Derek, and Stiles keeps repeating the words, `It’s alright my love.´ until one of the wolves surrounding the bed softly whispers, `He’s gone, Oh my God he’s gone.´

Stiles goes quiet but he cries openly now burying his head against the chest of the lifeless man, weak fingers grasping at the fabric of the older-Derek’s shirt as he cries.

Slowly the guest trickle away each leaving a kiss on the cooling brow of the wrinkled old-version of Derek Hale some whispering out words of, `I love you dad.´ the little boys and girls wishing him sweet dreams; soon enough only Stiles and a male who looks like a softer version of Derek are left inside the room, and the younger male moves over to where Stiles is still sobbing, the young man leans down to hug Stiles gently.

`I’m sorry dad, ´ the younger male whispers against Stiles neck.

Stiles seems to gather what little strength he has left and rests his head against that of the younger male, breathing out heavily, `I’m fine, ´ Stiles says it’s a clear lie but it’s the sort of thing Stiles would say, and then he gently cups the face of the younger male who flashes his red-eyes while whining miserably, `I will be fine baby boy, you should go, inform the rest of the pack. I just need a moment alone with your father. I need to be with him before they come to take him away.´

Derek watches his and Stiles son hesitates before Stiles’ cheek softly.

`Tyler, ´ Derek hears his mother say, `was the last of your kids to be born, an accident and an evening star, he was smallest, a runt as some would say. ´ then she looked at Derek and smiled proudly at him, `but you raised him never to doubt himself, told him stories about Stiles to teach him you didn’t have to be strong or tall to be great and powerful, that all it takes a good heart, ´ and Derek can tell, he just can, by looking at the young man who leaves the room and closes the door behind him that the young man has a good heart.

`Tyler grew to become the Alpha you’ve seen today because of you and Stiles, and you Derek kept Beacon Hills safe with Stiles when it would’ve burned to the ground under any other Alpha’s command.´

Derek watches as Stiles slowly moves to lay down on the bed next to the man he’d spent a lifetime with, he watched as Stiles carefully curled up close to the lifeless body of a man he’d had five children with, Stiles laid his head on Derek’s shoulder kissing his cheek and chest while wrapping Derek’s arms around him and holding on tightly.

`I could never stand to lose you,´ Stiles breathes out slowly, closing his eyes and then Derek hears it the way Stiles heart slows, and as he looks at his mother Talia smiles sorrowfully, `he will promise to you one day he would not leave you ever, and he’s kept his promise.´

`I, ´ Derek begins but he can’t say anything and as they return to the loft where his mother kisses his forehead gently.

`Derek, you must be brave, ´ she tells him firmly, `Life and love are terrifying things but I swear the rewards of a life well lived are beyond wonderful especially when shared with someone worthy.´

`Mom.´ Derek whimpers as she starts to fade, and now there’s a tear running down her cheek but she’s smiling none the less without any hint of sadness in her eyes as she says, `I know Derek, and I love and miss you too, but now you have a chance make my dreams come true for you, be brave sweetheart and don’t let him go.´ 


	4. Keep My Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome welcome to this tale of blood and junk, this chapter for this fic was requested by Twitchy-Tyrannosaur who asked for this chapter to be in Stiles point of view, she also wanted to get a look into Stiles unhappy mind but she wanted the fic to end with something sweet. Now I shall not lie for you can all surely tell that the time ran out on me since I just couldn’t get this fic to start rolling, and so the end was a rather hasty creation.

 

  
He wasn’t entirely sure what happened, then again Stiles may have been a bit buzzed and out of it, a bit high with adrenaline and unfocused on anything other than Derek and then the ache in his stupid heart, and Stiles had abused his Adderall yet again which left him pretty hyper of course he knew he shouldn’t do such a thing since it played tricks on his heart but it made him worry less made him feel like he was able to do all sorts.

  
But yes Stiles knew he was babbling like he could speed-up a one of those cars in NASCAR, of course he knew this since his mouth never stopped moving and he could feel the cool air brush against his tongue that moved just like his lips did, Stiles knew he was talking none-stop, and he knew that even if he hadn’t “over-medicated” himself and even if he wasn’t still on an adrenalin high then he would’ve still been babbling, Stiles talked like it was the only thing keeping him alive because that was what Stiles did when he felt anxious; Stiles talked when he was afraid, he babbled when he felt like he’d lost control of his small world and reason, he spewed words out without realization when he just needed to focus on something other than the sickening churning going on inside him. Stiles had to talk and he knew he talked because if he’d sat there quiet, mending Derek’s broken body then the sight of blood and all would’ve made him sick, and the last thing Stiles Stilinski wanted was to vomit on Derek Hale not that there was much to throw-up now that Stiles thought about it, he hadn’t been eating much of late since stress and the Adderall messed with his ability to feel hunger; but still who the hell would want to vomit on the guy you may or may not be pathetically in love with?

And so Stiles babbled, he talked and talked without knowing what he was saying, he was too focused on fixing Derek even if a part of Stiles, a small angry part of him wanted punish Derek for being so stupid as to go head to head with a crazed Alpha; Stiles just couldn’t handle losing Derek, sure the guy would never be to him what Stiles dreamt he would be and Stiles knew that one day if life decided to be kind to Derek that the hotter than the sun werewolf would find his true love and start a family of his own, but Stiles would handle losing Derek to another as long as it wasn’t to death, heck Stiles would gladly if Derek let him play the part of an awesome and cool uncle to his beautiful kids.

Stiles knows he’s babbling, he knows his thoughts are flying around inside his skull like eager little bees, and he does know in his heart that he’s probably annoying the shit out of Derek but it’s either babble or Stiles throwing-up on Derek, still Stiles didn’t expect to be told to shut-up in a less than friendly way while being told that the werewolf who without knowing owned Stiles heart told him to just leave which Stiles would’ve argued he never could if only Derek hadn’t said the words that followed.

`There’s not even a fucking reason for you to be here, just because you fucking tag along Scott doesn’t give you the right to come around to annoy me to death.´ Stiles tongue feels suddenly heavy in his mouth and there’s suddenly a nauseating lump in his throat that feels as heavy as the massive bolder in his aching belly, he’s startled about hearing the words that haunts his thoughts often leave Derek’s mouth so much so that he just stops, he just stops. He forgets what he was doing or meant to do, and he just stares up at the beautiful bloody man that continues to cut him down to bloody little ribbons no one wanted.

`You are so fucking annoying.´ Stiles attempts to swallow down the lump situated in his throat but it doesn’t budge, and he feels like he’s chocking while Derek just continues to let him know how worthless and unwanted he truly was, ` I can’t fucking stand you. You’re annoying voice makes me want to stab myself in the ear, and just looking at you hyperactive little….´

Stiles can’t breathe. Suddenly he’s forgotten the art of breathing. He’s shaking all over and he knows he’s starting to cry which isn’t something he wants to do in front of everyone. Stiles doesn’t want to cry in front of Derek of all people because he knows that it will only prove the werewolf right about how pathetic and weak he was, and Stiles never wanted him to think that about him, and yet he can’t halt the tears or the way a small sob may leave him. Poisonous and deadly thoughts start to sing inside his mind, the very sorts that had given life to the scars that sat on various easy to conceal parts of his body, these thoughts are the very sort that had more than once had him taking his father’s gun from the safe where his dad kept it and his badge locked away; these thoughts that reminded him of how useless he was, how he destroyed lives, was the ones that had him writing hasty little notes saying his farewells while the heavy gun waited to be used.

But Stiles hadn’t had the spine to go any further than raising the gun. Never had he found the courage to pull the trigger that would release him from the burden of life. Never did he manage to find the strength to take that one last step. But now as he was there on his knees dark thoughts urging him to go home and finish it, and feeling the ghostly touch of his mother’s gentle hands and lip, and even smelling her lavender scent the one that had become lost as her mind crumbled, he thinks he could finally finish it for there was no comfort in these delusional illusions of his all they do is make him yearn to join her; he’s just suddenly so exhausted with trying to keep a brave face, he feels like he’s spent too long trying to hang-on for people that honestly have no use of him anymore.

Breathing hurts, life hurts, and Stiles is done with hurting. Stiles has spent too long already hanging on and hurting, life just suck and continues to suck. The world is turning to shit anyway, there’s nothing good in the world left to give him a reason to believe that things are going to get better.

Greed rules all hearts of men. The rich keep getting richer and the poor keep getting poorer. People become more selfish and self-centered. Hate and cruelty run supreme. He feels like the leaps and bounds taken in human rights, equal rights are crumbling before him, like one day in the future what he is and will become is going to be seen as a crime and abomination. He and Danny will be called sick, twisted, and wrong. Suddenly all he sees is a future where people aren’t able or allowed to be who they are even if they do no real harm.

Stiles feels alone. He feels terrified of what is to come. And he feels so very disappointed in the world of man. And all he can think for a moment as he gathers his strength to get up and leave is that Humans as a whole suck, that there’s no such thing as humanity or goodness or fairness, there is and never will be equality.

Stiles is just so done. He’s wasted so much time already on this shit called life.

He’s just about to rise to his feet when suddenly Derek roars, the sound is something so loud and vicious that it startles him, has him walling on his ass eyes wide and fearful as he thinks for a moment that the injured werewolf was going to attack him; later he would find it strange how even when he craved for death he feared it when it was made to seem like it was coming for him in the shape of Derek’s sharp claws and teeth.

But it isn’t towards him that Derek leaps, it isn’t at his body the sharp claws are aimed at or even his bloody that is spilled. The startled and shocked gasp doesn’t fall from his lips as blood is drawn, and it wasn’t into his body the sharp claws dig and it isn’t into his face that Derek snarls out the words, `You. Will. Never. Touch. Him.´

Peter looks shocked and pale, sure he looks like he’s in a lot of pain too but above all he looks shocked like they all are. No one is moving towards the two Hales, all there are screams in the form or reasonable questions and demands for Derek to stop but Derek doesn’t answer them and he most certainly doesn’t stop his insane behavior.

`I know. I know what you sick and twisted mind wants to do,´ Derek growls tugging at something within Peter’s body that causes the other werewolf’s knees to buckle but he doesn’t drop, not much at least, `I know about you. About Stiles.´

And now Stiles is confused and so it seems is everyone else by the look of things, and Peter turns his pained gaze towards him and Stiles feels a cold chill run through him as a bloodied and twisted grin rises on the pale as death male.

`I’d bet,´ their oldest pack mate croaks as he turns his gaze back to his nephew, his once clawing hands have stopped moving and just holds onto the arm that is now searching for something inside his ribcage, `He’d make a won-wonderful b-bitch for m-me,´ those were the last words Peter gets to say before Derek roars loudly enough to cause all the windows to tremble, and Stiles can feel the vibration of that roar down to his useless soul.

With one swift pull of a bloodied hand, Derek’s bloodied and clawed-up hand as it was, Peter Hale’s eyes widen a fraction before the light in them dims and dies. The old-wolf that had always made Stiles feel uncomfortable, anxious, like he was being stripped down to the bone and violated, drops to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

And while Stiles may have been able to fight the urge to vomit a minute ago that ship had now sailed, the bloodied sails billowing in the wind while Stiles started to throw-up where he was on all fours with the horrific image burned into his mind of Derek holding Peter’s still beating heart in his bloodied and messy hands; not a single slasher movie or any other movie full of gore had prepared him to handle this, and the sound the heart made as Derek proceeded to rip the heart apart did not help ease Stiles nausea.

There’s suddenly just too much noise, people yelling and screaming as well as the sounds of Stiles own making as his body bends and arches while he dry heaves. He manages to vomit something that burns his throat to the point he goes between coughing and dry heaving.

He’s shaking violently by the time someone throws the old quilt Stiles had brought to the loft, he’d found it while scavenging through the Hale house before it was brought down, there were a lot of neat little things he’d rescued and was trying to fix-up so he could hand them all back to Derek. The stench of fire and death no longer ruled the fabric, the creation Derek’s grandmother had made, the small voice in the back of his mind that always seemed to possess his mother’s had guided him through the washing and even the repair of the quilt, and now it smelled like pack and Derek.

There are firm hands on him, moving him until he feels like he’s floating. Stiles refuses to open his eyes as he fears what he may see, and from the amount of noise he hears he fears it will be a sight where Derek is being killed by their pack, sure the guy hates him and shattered Stiles heart but Stiles doesn’t want Derek to die; Derek deserves to grow-old, to have a family of his own, to be happy and annoyed for many years to come. Derek doesn’t deserve to die before at least having a few good years first, and the thought of Derek being gone upsets him further not even the comfortable position he is maneuvered into helps to ease the dread grasping at his frantic heart.

There are arms suddenly wrapped around his shaking body and suddenly the screams die down, and because Stiles is as pathetic as he is he whimpers out the name of the man he still would die for at a drop of a hat if need be, he fears there will be no other answer than that he was dead.

`I’m here,´ that familiar voice of Derek Hale whispers in his ear, but this voice is different as no anger or annoyance sits there, no bemusement and mockery. This voice that tells him that Derek is not dead or dying is gentle and soft and it seems unreal enough for Stiles to risk a peek.

`That’s it Stiles, just calm down. You’re safe. ´ Derek tells him, eyes familiar in color but the dare Stiles say it? The tenderness there is new, unfamiliar and beyond beautiful.

`Derek?´ Stiles croaks, his throat hurts like a son-of-a-bitch, but he doubts what he is seeing and experiencing because surely he was not being cuddled and comforted by Derek Hale?

`Yeah it’s me, ´ Derek responds a little smile tugging at his lips.

`P-Peter, you – you,´ Stiles starts but the memory of what he’d seen was a bit too much and instead of finishing what he’d set out to do he just closed his eyes and buried his face against Derek’s shoulder.

`I – I had too, ´ Derek says as if there was no room for arguing, `he, he would’ve done something to you – eventually.´

There’s a part of Stiles that wants to argue but as Derek tells him that he would never allow anyone to hurt Stiles again, that voice that sounds so much like his mother tells him not to question things, and Stiles is willing to accept anything at the moment as suddenly he feels less cold and the aches and pains in his exhausted body start to fade away.

`I’m an idiot Stiles, you’re right about that.´ Derek tells him, his firm and strong hands rubbing gently the knots in his back away, `And I shouldn’t have said those things to you – I’m just a coward who loves you, ´ there are gasps and murmurs but Stiles doesn’t bother to figure them out instead he looks up at Derek needing to make sure he heard him right.

`You – you love me? ´ the smile that tugs at Derek’s lips is a sweet smile indeed and Stiles thinks perhaps he was wrong about how beautiful Derek was, since now that he truly looked at him he was just the sort of person he would gladly look at even when the world burned around them and the human race finally killed itself.

`I do, I’ve loved you for a while now Stiles, but you scare me.´ the wolf confesses, and Stiles sees a flicker of sadness in the beautiful eyes of the werewolf who had ripped his heart apart and was slowly gluing it back together again.

`You have?´ Stiles asks and Derek just nods before brushing his lips against Stiles temple while mumbling out, `I have, and I promise if you’ll let me I’ll spend the rest of my life proving it to you.´

`Really? ´ Stiles asks because he’s starting to think he might’ve lost his marbles, could one actually throw-up a couple of brain cells?

Derek just nods before looking straight into his eyes, and then he says something like feels like a promise that could and would never be broken the werewolf says, `And I’ll never leave you, not until you tell me I can.´ and Stiles, well Stiles believed him.


End file.
